Moving is one of the most stressful events in life. Between waiting anxiously for your last apartment’s deposit subtotal and loading and unloading your furniture and boxes, moving can certainly be the cause of daytime migraines and sleepless nights. Now, imagine moving cross country…with your kids!
Sure, moving by itself is manageable, but managing long distance moving with a family can be a little overwhelming. If you and your family is planning on making a big, cross country move, here are a few tips you may want to keep in mind that will make this transition easier for you and your kids.
Know Your Demographic
Demographic is another word for characteristics. Before your talk to your kids, you have to know how to understand them (and the big move’s impact) according to their age in order to make the transition as smooth as possible. For example, a 4-year old’s concern’s can be completely different from that of a 14-year old.
For kids that have yet to attend school, their biggest concern could be loss of their room or the drastic change in their surroundings. For school aged children, the most common concern would be the loss of friendships and the fear of starting anew in a new school. By understanding and addressing their specific concerns, you’ll be able to help them ease into the idea of a new home and a new town.
Talk to Your Kids
Moving a far distance can come to quite a shock to some kids, especially if they are attending school. You’ll want to give your kids enough information of the new town and new school. The more information, the easier it can be for your kids to accept the big move.
You may also want to involve your kids in house-hunting if you have yet to find a house to live in. By doing so, the change seems less forced and more involved.
Lessons in Moving
Think of moving as a chance to teach your kids about independence, responsibility and charity. First, your kids have to know that they are responsible for packing what’s theirs. Some may expect their parents to handle all the packing, however, by teaching kids how to pack and allowing them pack their things, they’ll learn how to be more independent as well as learn how to be more responsible with their things.
Most families tend to scrap a lot of their unused items and keep only the necessities. However, by donating your unused things, as well as encouraging your kids to donate what they don’t need teaches them to value what they have and give away what they don’t need to the less fortunate.
Not only will you be teaching your kids life-long lessons, but you’ll also get them involved in the big move, keeping their minds distracted from transitioning to a new place.
Encourage Them Creatively
Help your kids make their new accommodations their own. If your budget allows it, encourage your kids to design and arrange their new room. By doing so, they’ll be able to nest and become more at ease with their new surroundings. Not only will they feel at home, but they’ll be able to expand their minds creatively.
How To Fit In
One of the biggest fears for new kids is their inability to fit in. Most common among summer movers, some parents tend to sign up their kids for extracurricular clubs or activities. For example, if you’re moving during the summer, you could encourage your kids to become part of a sports or arts club, or even attend summer camp. This way, they’ll be able to begin forming relationships just before school starts.
Time and Space
It’s normal for kids to regress and withdraw socially in the first few weeks or months after the big move. This is normal. Understand that kids need time and space in order to adjust and integrate into their new surroundings.
By following these pieces of advice, you’ll be able to help your kids adjust to their new surroundings, getting them on track both educationally and socially.
*Guest post by Becky W
Moving is stressful & painful to adult but it will be more painful to the kids. So, always become a support to your kids & tell them about the moving process, reason, benefits. Always involve your kids in the packing phase & to increase their interest throughout the packing by doing few adventurous things.
some wonderful points an tips,,all kids want to be included when theres something big going on
Thanks for these tips. I have helped my sister and her kids move all over the place and this is always a struggle.
great tips, so important to talk to your kids about everything !:)
VERY useful tips! Moving is such a stressful time – for the whole family! Everything is new, and sometimes it’s just so overwhelming! I especially like your suggestion about encouraging the kids to donate what they no longer need or want – this really does make them feel special!
Thank you for these tips! I think sometimes we forget about how much of an impact that moving can have on children. So important to remember their feelings and concerns and acknowledge how they are feeling, Great info!
we arent moving cross country but we are moving further south so these are very handy! thanks
As a child I lived in 15 different houses and three different countries. i am no army brat just lived with parents who like to do up houses and change them . The biggest move for me was Uk-Australia. I was a teenager. The best thing my parents did, was getting me involved. Every process they’d ask me my opinion on the house , how would I decorate it . You’ve mentioned some fantastic points and I really love your post well done.
These are great tips. I think for us when we moved, it was important to try to stay on a semi normal schedule. My kids thrive on routine. That seemed to help them adjust a little faster.
great tips. if i ever move i will know what to do
I wish I had read your advice when we moved country. Lots of very good pointers especially about fitting in. Wonderful advice!
Our kids have never had to move but my sister did recently and her daughter who was in High school had a lot of anxiety about it. She said when they got to their new house she encouraged her daughter to join a club or two when school started which has really helped her to make friends quickly and fit in.
These are all wonderful tips for moving with kids. It is very stressful for them as they lose their old friends and have to make new ones.
when i was a kid? i had a blast moving cross country